The dangers of "overwriting"

One of the pitfalls of many novice writers is packing too much into sentences and paragraphs. We have referred to this in previous essays as a "suitcase sentence or paragraph," packed so full that you have to sit on it to close it.
I had a student one time who literally was writing about packing a suitcase. A character in the story was going on a trip and was packing. The writer told just about every garment that was thrown in the suitcase and the sentence bogged down to the point of almost being unreadable.
Sometimes writers describe something in such detail, with four or five adjectives in front of the noun, the reader gets lost in the maze of words.
Here's a simple rule to help avoid all of that. Write to express, not to impress.
Each year, San Jose State University holds a funny contest in which it invites writers to compose the worst sentences - and gives out prizes. Writing these sentences is a good exercise in what not to do. Here is one of the winners in which the writer ... well, you'll see.
"With her auburn hair cascading down to her neck, her face gracefully tanned and silky smooth, her lips thin and moist and her lithe contour having the hour-glass figure of a model, Mary's body was beyond description."
Sometimes, bad writing shows up in the form of atrocious puns and plays on words, such as...
"As James worked on his sculpture of Sister Mary, his favorite nun, he encountered difficulty chipping away at her clothing and he thought to himself, `some habits are hard to break'."
And my favorite from the San Jose State contest: "When Throckmorton passed gas in the echo chamber, he knew he'd never hear the end of it."